ffunkel54 posted an update 2 months ago
Loni Love, a comedian best known as a panelist on ‚ÄúChelsea Lately,‚ÄĚ says she fell into giving romantic advice only because people kept asking her for it.
‚ÄúPeople say they get a warmness from me,‚ÄĚ says Love, who put it all down in her book out Tuesday, ‚ÄúLove Him or Leave Him, But Don‚Äôt Get Stuck with the Tab: Hilarious Advice for Real Women.‚ÄĚ
‚ÄúAlso, I look at life a little bit differently,‚ÄĚ she adds. ‚ÄúMy viewpoint seems to help them.‚ÄĚ
Love, 42, says the weirdest question she‚Äôs ever been asked came from a woman who wondered if it was okay to date her mother‚Äôs ex.
‚ÄúWhy would you want to?‚ÄĚ asks the self-fashioned love guru, ‚ÄúThat‚Äôs just spreading the DNA around too much. It‚Äôs messy.‚ÄĚ
Love is aware that it‚Äôs somewhat ‚Äúfunny and ironic‚ÄĚ that someone would ask a comic about love stuff given that it‚Äôs pretty serious business.
‚ÄúBut love is funny and ironic,‚ÄĚ she says. ‚ÄúMy point is that it should be a lot about levity and having a good time. If it‚Äôs not, something‚Äôs wrong.‚ÄĚ
Love, who brings a large, ribald Michael Kors Hamilton Tote presence to E!‚Äôs ‚ÄúChelsea Lately‚ÄĚ ‚Äē in a staged annual ‚Äúreview,‚ÄĚ host Chelsea Handler told her she would be asked back to the show more frequently if she used the f-bomb less ‚Äē is single.
‚ÄúCurrently, I‚Äôm a satisfied single with no cats,‚ÄĚ she laughs. ‚ÄúRight now, because of my schedule, there really is no time. But I Michael Kors Hamilton Satchel do have suitors. I have a good time.‚ÄĚ
She‚Äôs also dated a lot. The book lists a pile up of exes.
‚ÄúListen, I‚Äôm 42. I‚Äôve been in and out of relationships for a long time,‚ÄĚ she says.
Though Love was married briefly when she was younger, she says not again.
‚ÄúI‚Äôve never had a yearning to get married. I never wanted a traditional lifestyle. I‚Äôm not that kind of person.‚ÄĚ
The personal love dilemmas she recalls in the book certainly suggest that. In one anecdote, she surprises a boyfriend with a stripper pole in the bedroom only to come away with bruised cheeks.
‚ÄúHe was going to a strip club and I thought, I‚Äôm going to get me a pole. But poles have weight requirements. Oh, man,‚ÄĚ laughs the comic who in her standup act jokes, ‚ÄúI‚Äôm fat and I support fat celebrities, like Oprah.‚ÄĚ
Love, who grew up in Detroit during the crack epidemic and made her way as an engineer before breaking into standup on ‚ÄúStar Michael Kors Python Search,‚ÄĚ says an important part of her message is that ‚Äúall sex counts.‚ÄĚ
‚ÄúI hear it over and over, ladies in Michael Kors Hamilton a relationship who go on vacation and say sex doesn‚Äôt count then. Or, it doesn‚Äôt Cheap Michael Kors Handbags count in a bathroom at the club,‚ÄĚ says Love.
‚ÄúI‚Äôm here to tell you, it counts, sweetie. Especially if you get pregnant.‚ÄĚ
In the book, Love writes that a ‚Äúfriend Chelsea has had so many sex partners that even if she wears a snow-white dress to the church on her wedding day, by the time she gets to the altar it will look like Darth Vader is gliding down the aisle. But at least she doesn‚Äôt pretend the sex never happened.‚ÄĚ
Love swears that the Chelsea she names isn‚Äôt the Chelsea she works for.
‚ÄúI made up names for people in the book. I used her name, but that‚Äôs not her. Seriously, seriously, girl,‚ÄĚ she says sounding a bit perturbed.
In any case, Love says Handler won‚Äôt hear from her on the subject of romance.
‚ÄúChelsea doesn‚Äôt need love advice ‚Äôcause she has money. If you are a woman with your own money, you have confidence. You have the pick of the litter.‚ÄĚ
So, she says, does Handler‚Äôs diminutive assistant, Chuy.
‚ÄúChuy is doing fine that way,‚ÄĚ according to Love. ‚ÄúI love Chuy, but I can‚Äôt understand anything he says.‚ÄĚ
She says it as Michael Kors Handbags if that‚Äôs a good thing.
‚ÄúWe like men we can‚Äôt understand when they talk,‚ÄĚ Love explains. ‚ÄúThat way, they can‚Äôt make us mad.‚ÄĚ